today was quite tense between few people and me... hm... a so call 'misunderstanding' took place... i have comments abt the incident but decided to gave up explaining cus no matter how u explain, there'll still be a gap between, so y explain...

it's always one sides that thinks wrongly, i didn't meant anything... ok... I didn't blame anyone, I just blame myself on starting that whole stupid entry (starting i just wan all 4D to post their views, but it came out me being blame) ! it doesn't mean that i love 4D i shd die die love the people too !! but, bearing in mind that not everyone is perfect !! and I'm also not perfect, y they just cant understand ??? and that's only my PERSONAL views !! (is saying out my personal view wrong ?? I am a human, I have feelings, y dun u understand, put urself in other people's shoes)

I felt like being used (not to offend)... when i'm needed, they find me, when incident like this happen, they treat me differently... they also said that no to start quarreling and this broke it !! put me on blame, I just wan to sae I was totally pissed off when i post that entry, my temper is like that : when I'm pissed off, i do offensive things, I just cant help unless there's someone's there for me to express my anger !!

today, it's like all the girls going against me, and frens are only the boys... and mayb the WHOLE class will go against me !! execpt PY and some... they seem to push me to my limits !! *sadness*... is it worth it to break a friendship, cus of this incident... if it's really worth it, this class will be worthless to stay on...

I have a dought !! did I offended Fiona?? Why did she say, "I also do it(maths homework) earlier. Math clever, big arh !" when I said that I did it earlier !! it seems like she's the only one 'against' me at first... then when CME lesson, she whispered in a small group, like gossiping about me !! what did I do ? if it's on the bulletin board thing, why did she say this ?? it's irrevlant !! I've been given in to her, and let her say bad things about me... one day, I'll blow up !! definitely !! if she hated me earlier, and she uesd this as a reason to let everyone hate me, its soooo stupid !!

feeling better now, just now I was with PY, 'F4', 'JJ' and
'photographer'... haha... F4 is KS, JW, MK and
JC... JJ is adrian and Photographer is Eugene... hehe...

went for an interview at Mr Suaini's classroom after that went to find Swing at the canteen but she's not there, so went up to find
PY, but she's still interviewing, so sat down with them... talking crap... haha... quite lame... after those under interview came out, they decide to have lunch...so they toast a coin to determind where to go for lunch after school... after that went to
CP, Yoshinoya... wah... JC ate to sets !! they took couple of photos... haha... funny shots !!

saw Lingz and Swing at KFC... walk around CP like crazy people... haha.. talking crap !! after that took a bus back home with
JC and Eugene... they (F4 they all) comfort me lots during we're together !!

hm... Fiona didn't say bad things about me today... quite curious but glad too... hm... KS left his PE attire in Mrs Shahul's class, and because of that, we(me, JW,MK, Eugene) went to find/wait for her... after that help her clean her classroom... hm... good students !! but only KS is sweeping the floor... haha... he went for soccer after that and the rest were eating... Auntie was so good, she gave me more rice, more soup at normal price, mayb it was after school and not much people were left in school...

ytd, went to RM to ask about treatment for my hair... after getting information from the lady at the counter, decided to get my hair rebond !! yeah... made appointment on Sat. but Swing said that after rebonding I can't tie my hair for 3 days... haiz... mayb i'll change date to Friday...

seen a Sec 3 boy at sch whose eyes n eyebrows looks like NV boi !! actually, Im suppose to tell Swing how he looked like... but we parted and go in diff. routes home... and on my way to the crossroads near my block, I saw that Sec 3 boy !! oh... nvm...
I looked at him, and he looked at me, oh... really look alike !!

going rebonding later... hm... after that, shd be going to study... not sure how long will it took, if it's long so, too bad... but Ms Tan, my physic teacher, is teahing... haiz...

ytd was a very 'happy' day for my class... haha... in physics lesson, Fiona and qiu was singing, and singing on the commericals... that coke commerical was fun, qiu was making the music and the rest was saying 'chiwawa'... den he, jun wei n eugene was the female leads in the pepsi commerical... haha... qiu as britney... lolZz... hm... then in the morning excerise, it could be consider the only morning excerise I participate most... as in I did all the excerises told... my arms still hurts, muscle pain, somemore I applied counter pain ytd night... ytd during maths lesson, Fiona, Caris and Mr Nazri was saying 'lame', 'cold' jokes/riddles...

the joke Mr nazri said was really 'cold' : there're two men in a room, and another man brought his son in and he told his count to count the no. of people in the room, and his son said 3 person... why ?........because his son don't know how to count...

and today, Jia Hao asked : why the monkey's leg is sour (in chinese) .... because it stepped on lemon...

just now eugene and qiu quarrel... y quarrel... just a game, what I think is qiu don't want to 'play' with him, cus he wasn't that shou wan ying... haha... whatever... I don't even care about him... he even say that he wanted to call people to beat qiu up... hey, if he really wanted that most of the class will be on qiu side... and in class he'll most probably be alone... haiz... heck him... haiz...

just came home after dinner in CP, I felt that I'm in a misery whenever I'm with my parents... I don't know why, I don't laugh, I don't smile often, maybe its because I don't suit inside their conversation... I feel so sad, hoping that I'm with my friends always... so at least I can feel happier...

when to guardian to buy newspaper and Teens magazine... I'm totally angry with the 'woman' (isn't that old actually) at the counter, when she scan the Teens magazine, it's as if that mazagine is her's, she took and fold, roughly, made me totally pissed off... I feel like stabbing her to death, stab her, slap her, bomb her face, cut her meat and feed the crocodiles/dogs/cat/etc, and for her red face, burn it till its black... I hate her... totally angry...

today, still feeling quiet low... hm... ok lar... I kind of enjoy it... starting to feel that being alone wasn't that bad/bored... but me being low to my classmates maybe a little weird, cus everyday I was smiling ?! I feel that everyday smiling makes me too emotional, I don't want to express my emotions, in fact I would like to like it inside of me... let curious people figure how I feel ?! mayb after school, I'll be back as normal ?! with more words to say ...

ok, my topic of the day... why is it to whisper when there's small little things to comment about ? I didn't really mind actually, but it's seems annoying to me, cus it's things about me... for example, If a fren's thing was same as mine, why should you whisper to her ? is it that you wanted to say I'm the one copying and not her, cus she's closer to you ? that's what you normally say, people copying you !! I've a question, why is it people copying you and not you copying people ? so what people copys you, it's so selfish to think that way, why shd you go care about others ? as long as you know you get this thing earlier than whoever, that's enough.... haiz... guess these people are like that... this world is full of strange people...

after 3hrs of rebonding, I felt cold and straving!! went to took my dinner and went to CDAC to study, however, Ms Tan didn't came... but think she'll come on Monday... tml will be studying too also at CDAC !! took a couple of my pics !! uploaded in here go check it out !! love my new look !! love that pic taken with Eugene's Mesh Cap... my hair seems irresistable to me !!

when I reached there, of cus PY knew it, cus told her b4 hand !! Wei n Adrian don't seems to notice, nvm... Eugene was the first to notice it i guess... and that JC !! grrr... been friends for so long and he didn't notice it !! mayb we seldom go out together and we're in diff. class... haiz...

today morning when to Bugis with bemudas and a shirt... hm... bought a wallet MYUK in OG... hm... love it !!

the tension among me and Fiona had went down... peace at last... or maybe end of the week... *hur* went to school with a new look !! yeah !!

ytd night hadn't sleep well, cus I 'sprain' my neck... it hurts !! but it's much better now... hopefully... didn't have enough sleep actually !! so i'm not letting this ruin my day/week !! yeah !!

today, the principle announced that instead of us, students, walking from class to class, it's now the teachers' turn!! thank god !! it's like back to my Primary School life !! better still, teachers won't have to complaint about us being late !!! this is the last week to N levels and it seems like my class is still in the happy mood !! or maybe just in school !! hm... must memerise subject topics !! must sleep well, eat well to keep out of the STRESS !! really hoped everyone raised up to Sec % next year !! don't give up that easily, if there's a will, there's a way !!

ytd was the mooncake festival, went to 299 for a gathering of my class... hm... played badminton... at first don' really feel like going cus i'm feeling tired... didn't sleep well recently... haiz...went home around 7.30+ pm... with my father, he took me to Punggol End... there make me think of the days in the Pri 5 camp... cus the camp site was there perviously... he also took me round Punggol 'exploring'... went home after that.. hoping NV Boi is around playing with candles sorts... but didn't get to see him, mayb I didn't went to the 'park/fitness corner'... there shd have alot of people !! took alot of my neighbourhood and punggol area... go check it out !!

Left home at around 7.05am, hoping NV Boi to appear he won't cus he went out around 7am so... nothing really happen much today... walked home under drizzying rain with Swing...